Wake up people

Hey guys I'm back.  Just as hopeless as ever. No tech tip today just simple advice.  If a technician leaves you his or her number don't be a dumbass and call him or her after 7pm. Stop being idiots these people have lives they don't live to only serve you.  So wake the f*** up and get off your high horse it's only cable people. It can wait til the next morning deal with it then. I'm done for now I don't know when I'll be back. If you need me comment or message me at hopelesstech305 @gmail.com.

Terrible

   Hey guys I wanted to post today first because I want you guys to know I haven't forgotten you and second to keep you in the loop. In florida Tropical Storm Isaac just passed by and thankfully the damage was minimal.

   We had a technician out doing service appointments in one of our areas on Sunday. This technician was pulled over by a law enforment officer and was told to get off the road. This techncian tells his supervisor the situation and the supervisor proceeds to send a message to the corporate office in P.A.. The corporate office reply was to stay on the road and when the weather becomes dangerous to pull over to the side of the road (ARE YOU KIDDING ME!).

   This is the new xfinity. F*** safety  and drive on. I can't believe this insanity. This is terrible and it sickens me. This is what happens when employees don't stand up to the tyrany. The nerves are so tense that employees are talking about going on strike. Whatever happens I know that this is not how things are done.

   The next thing is home security from xfinity. Another avenue for a service that will not work. What's the bonus? Employees will get no type of increase for knowing how to install/troubleshoot this service. There are companies out there like (ADT) that pay their technicians 15+ an hour for one service.

   Wake up comcasters! Time to stand united. These corporate a******* need to listen to our demands and meet them. This is hopeless tech signing off.

A Bit of Hope

  Well readers here is a bit of hope for you. Comcast is trying hard to clean their tarnished image. With this said I want to let you in on a little secret. If you have had the same issue with your service today is your lucky day. Don't waste your time calling customer service. 
  I'm posting the number to the Corporate office in Philidelphia,P.A. There are two numbers (215-665-1700 or 215-665-2278). Give them your complaint and they will send an escalation must resolve ticket to your local office. This is the equivalent of a nuclear bomb. It will get people moving and your service restored. comment and join my blog. This is hopelesstech signing off.

A Taste of What's to Come by T. Coheese

First of all, you should know that I’m a fantastic liar. Ignore the paradox, and accept I’m telling you the truth. Now, I’m not always such a galactic asshole, so this only applies to some situations. I’m a normal asshole the other times. If I’m pressed for time to get to my next appointment, or it’s getting late in the day (more on that in a bit), I will tell you exactly what you think you want to hear. I look for cues that you give me on how best to extinguish the fire that is your cable emergency (TV, internet, or phone). I won’t troubleshoot the source of the fire; I’m just giving you a pacifier. I will not only get you involved in helping me sell you a lie, but I will also steer you into believing that you had the solution for your problem the entire time. Audience participation is grand, is it not?

Without further ado, I will cite an example I use every day. This concerns swapping your equipment. I’ll keep things simple and use a modem for this example. If you hint that you think your rented modem is faulty, I’ll exchange it for you and praise you for pointing out something so simply obvious. I’ll even agree with you that the previous tech “didn’t do his job.” Chances are pretty good, however, that there is a more severe underlying issue that needs attending to, but I don’t fucking care because I’m one moment closer to going home for the day. This is my ultimate goal for every goddamn day I work: going home as early as fuck if possible. Everything else (your problems, your concerns, traffic, your empty threats of canceling your service, etc.) is just an impediment to this.

 Will I really change your modem if it was working fine when I got to your home? No, or rather, I’ll change it if you have the decency not to treat me like a servant or an imbecile on the basis that you just flat-out want a different modem. Your honesty scores big points with me, and I’m more willing to extend to you that courtesy even if that tree bears no fruit. You’ll hear no complaints from me, and you’ll, at least, have equipment you believe won’t fuck up on you.

Under most other circumstances, though, I will not exchange it. I will, however, give you the illusion that I will. Let me explain. I unplug every cable from your modem. I take your modem to my van but leave the cables in your home. At this point, if you’re an observant customer, you should be suspicious. I may have only one modem left in my van, or I may have six, but if I go to my van with only your modem, I don’t intend to exchange it for another one. When I get to my van, I’ll remove any stickers that are on your modem (Gen 3 Tested, Tested By, etc.) and give it a quick wipe-down with WD-40. Then, I’ll dry it off as best I can. I’ll then look around my van for some left-over shrink wrap. I’ll grab a nearby power cord (although, it doesn’t even have to be a modem power cord), a packaged Ethernet cable, and lazily shove all three into the shrink wrap. As I’m reentering your home, I’ve already begun acting as if I’m struggling with the shrink wrap on the new modem. I do this because I don’t want you to notice that I came back with your old modem and open and wrinkled shrink wrap. I’ll install it the same way you previously had it installed. By this time, I’ve got you fully believing the lie. I’m a great performance artist, I know. At which point, I’ll offer you to keep the new power cord and Ethernet cable. I don’t care if the power cord is for another piece of equipment like a cable box. If you accept either or both of them, I am, basically, giving you my trash to throw away. What the eyes see the mind believes, right? If you truly want a tech to swap out your equipment, be honest, decent and ask him to first bring the new equipment into your home. It’s not a guarantee this will fix anything, but you’ll have the peace of mind of having different equipment.

-T. Coheese

Vacation

Hey guys I haven't forgotten about you. I have been on vacation since my last post. I had a long needed break from the anal raping that Comcast loves to give to their employees and customers. In the next few days I will continue to expose confessions given by myself and other hopeless employees out there. Talk to you guys soon and keep fighting the good fight.

Confession 2

       Hey guys this is hopeless. I want you guys to know that I'm working on making this blog better. I have been seeking consultation as to what I can do to make things better. On this post I'm going to talk about digital interruption. A technician refers to digital interruption as digital tiling because other than your audio sounding horrible you get little squares in your picture. If you experience some tiling there are a few things you can do before you call Comcast. First make sure if its only one TV set or more.

        If one set is tiling it can be an individual issue with the converter or the wiring. If all your TVs are doing the same thing most likely the issue is outside your home. If this is happening to you call Comcast and prepare to be on the phone for at least an hour. Before you get on the phone if you only have an issue with one digital converter,  try to get the serial number of the converter. This is mostly located behind the converter. If you have the same issue on all your equipment then don't worry about it. When you have a rep on the phone I suggest you attempt to let the rep know that all your equipment is malfunctioning the same way. The reason I say you attempt is because the rep on the phone sometimes doesn't know any better than the script that is in front of them. Nicely let them know you would like to know if there is an area issue and if there is no issue then you need to schedule an appointment. A lot of representatives will tell you before they get off the phone with you that your box is bad and needs replacement. This is not always true. The reps ass is sitting in a call center and has no idea what is going on in your home. All a rep can do is assume and we all know what happens when we ASS-U-ME.

       Please and I beg you please don't tell a technician its your box when he/she arrives at your home. We hate that and honestly it makes most of us not want to change your equipment. Be honest with the technician and let them know you would like to have your converter changed out because you lost all confidence in the equipment. We understand that. What most technicians don't like is to be told how to do their job. I'm not going to go to your job and tell you how to do your job so don't tell me how to do mine.

       At the end of the day technicians know Comcast customers are getting raped by the crappy service and prices. Work with us and we will for sure work with you because we want you to have good service at least for 30 days, but hopefully for more. Like I said the service is unreliable so if it works for 30 days or more consider yourself one of the lucky ones. On my next post I will post in detail what a technician is rated on. I know what I wrote on my previous post, but I felt the customers needed a bit of guidance.

Confession 1

           Hey guys this is my first post on this blog. What can I say other than I work for Comcast. First I want you to know that many things have happened in the 10 years I have worked for this company. At first I have to tell you it was great and I was extremely proud to work for this company, but recently I find myself trying to hide the fact that I work for this business. I'm a technician and I witness everyday the abuse that this company puts on the customers and employees.
           
            Let me start with the employees and the standards that we are held to. Rework- A combination of call backs on installations and service calls. Lets say I went to your house today and you have been having problems with your internet. I go and and identify what is causing the problem. Lets say its a bad connector outside. I repair the issue and at the time that I'm there I check your cable service and everything seems to be working right. From the moment I leave your home lets say July 1, 2012. If you the customer call back for any issue for example your cable box died in a power outage on July 20th if a technician comes out to your house within a 30 day period for any service issue it affects my metrics which in turn affect one of the categories of the yearly review and that is a huge category to screw up in. There is only one way the technician can stop that from happening and that is by becoming a psychic magician or giving you his/her phone number. There is only one huge problem with that lets say its 10:30pm on July 20th I'm not working and a customer calls my phone. How friendly do you think I will be at that time when I'm most likely at home with my family? Where I work most customers don't have consideration even when I have instructed customers in the past not to call me on my off days and after my shift ends. My phone would ring at late hours of the night and I would get messages like "I don't know how to watch my DVD".

              At the end of the day a technician gets rated in a lot of things and if those metrics are not met a technician will not get his 3-5% increase which is more like 1.9% average now. I have yet to break 40k a year. Having a military background and a college education. Reading this you're probably asking yourself why hasn't this guy tried to move up the corporate ladder? I have tried many times. I have come to the conclusion that the reason I haven't been given an opportunity is because I have one thing that most people don't have and that is COMMON SENSE!! which isn't common at all in this company. Enough about technicians let talk about the customer. Customers and excuse my french get fucked worst than any employee sorry to say. The average customer pays comcast about $150 a month that's for internet and cable. I won't even talk about the phone service or business service yet. If you own your own business and have business class from comcast you'll cry after I tell you. I'll give you a sneak peak. Okay business customer have you asked yourself if comcast  uses their own service to run their offices? Well the answer is HELL NO and you know why? I'll tell you on another post.

             Customers the reason you're getting fucked is because no matter what happens in your home like how new your installation is or the area where you live is eventually your service will go down. It's not reliable sorry to say but it's the truth but hey it keeps me working, it's an unfortunate situation sorry. The one thing you can count on is that your service eventually will be interrupted. That's about one of the few things comcast guarantees that you will have problems with your service and that your cable will be shut off if you don't pay.  On my next post I will post everything a technician needs to worry about in order to get his/her 1.9% at the end of the year. I will post more confessions if you have any questions for me post a comment I will answer it to the best of my ability I'm only a technician so I don't know everything. Join the blog and if there are any employees or ex employees out there that want their confession published send it to me so I can post it. If you work for Comcast please remain anonymous for your own safety.